Loss and Light: Our Sacha Saying Goodbye

These words I wrote for Sacha’s service.

Every summer from 2015 to 2020, we spent the Christmas holidays traveling around NZ. Sacha’s favorite part of caravanning was when I read aloud at bedtime, and then we‘d all say ‘Goodnight, John-boy’ to each other.

Teaching Sacha the how-tos of sewing techniques and basic principles she didn’t think she needed or wanted to know.

Learning how to drive Bruce’s work Van, Sacha got very good at reversing up our driveway and reminding us about the road rules nowadays!

While Sacha was away in India, Bruce brought a new 4WD truck. He was excited to teach Sacha how to drive it around the South Coast.

Over these last few days, he’s been taking Sacha’s friends and teaching them how to drive on the beach, which is so bittersweet.

On her 18th birthday, just after Christmas, we went test-driving a manual Suzuki Jimny. Sacha was determined to get the vehicle she wanted first, so she was saving for her perfect 4WD vehicle to take her friends around NZ.

Sacha was very efficient with dying my greys, cutting our hair, washing Natasha’s hair/head till it was squeaky clean, shaving bruces head, and tweezering all the old man's hair; she enjoyed inflicting pain on Bruce a bit too much.

We just got her professional hairdressing scissors for Christmas, dryers, and everything else she would need. I wouldn’t let her use them before she went to India in case she cut herself.

We had her all set up, ready to start her adult life as a professional hairdresser, which she was a natural at, gaining top of her class at Weltech, all ready to go be and do.

Sacha was always busy. On her brief moments at home, I could hold her here long enough to check her over, do any bodywork, and replenish her.

The day she left for India, I massaged her beautiful body. She loved it when I massaged her, but never often enough. 

Unfortunately, on tour in India, Sacha experienced bullying and exclusion from her own NZCF team and leaders. They should have behaved better, and I hope they do better moving forward.

Sacha continued to hold herself with the utmost character of respect, kindness, and warmth to others, which led her to meet and form strong bonds of friendship with the cadets from other countries on tour with her.

Sacha had a strong, loving, friendly attitude that shone through to all her official duties on tour and all those she met in India.

Bruce, Natasha, and I were often told by people who came to help us in India how they met our Sacha and how she held herself so dignified, bright, and friendly with a lovely smile. 

Sacha is always the first to support and help others. Although she was rough on her sister, she was always there to help Natasha be her best in whatever she did.

And Natasha was and is always there alongside Sacha. 

Natasha was there for Sacha as she decided it was her time. Natasha guided Sacha’s spirit from her body so she could transition on with our beloved friend Trish, who was ready and waiting to guide her.

Our version of Sacha is full of life: laughing, singing, dancing, 4-wheel driving, rallying, rafting, horse riding, ocean swims, jumping off cliffs into rivers, trying all the food stalls at markets, and churros!

She also cooks, crafts, creates, and gives the most awesome hugs—hug me back harder, she’d say.

She spent an 8-week jewelry class making a necklace and chain for Natasha; the chain links contained her blood, sweat, and tears.

If we were still in bed when she woke in the morning, she’d jump in the middle getting her cuddles; this was always much nicer than waking her for work. Not the best morning person.

And coming home late at night, she’d come in and see us, laying on top of me, sharing her day.

Then, leaving the room for her bed, she’d take my pillow, tickle Bruce’s feet, shed the bedding, and switch the light on as she left the room with us, yelling at her,

… all to get me out of bed so that I could tuck her into her bed.

Our beautiful girl, sweet dreams, Sacha.

27.12.2004 - 02.02.2023

This is the day the NZ High Commission India flew their flag at half mast for Sacha. Mark our host in the compound took Bruce and me to see the flag, this afternoon as usual for Delhi there was no wind. The flag was hanging limp. I ask Sacha to make the flag fly for us and on queue, a breeze began to build… here is Sacha flying the NZ flag in India!

Sacha Wallace Piper our beautiful gorgeous girl left this world suddenly while exploring India with the NZCF on 2nd Feb 23.

Sacha became gravely ill while away in India with the NZ cadet force for the Indian Independence celebrations Jan-Feb 2023, as part of an NZ contingent team with her fellow Navy, Air, and Army NZ cadets.

After many days in pain, Sacha was finally taken to the Indian forces base hospital in New Delhi, where, with a CT scan and MRI, they found she had experienced a brain aneurysm; Sacha's health deteriorated very quickly.

Bruce, Natasha, and I rushed our way to India, where we were met by the NZ high commission and Indian defense force at the airport and taken straight to her ICU bedside.

For a day and a half, we were bedside as she made her way; we played her favorite music on Bruce’s phone, placed it on her pillow, and called her closest friends and family on my phone for them to share their love and goodbyes.

When Sacha was ready to leave her body, my older daughter Natasha helped her spirit release from her bodysuit, and Trish, her other mother (close family friend) who passed away three years ago, came through Natasha to guide and take care of Sacha as she passed over.

The Indian base hospital in New Delhi's medical team was completely in tune with Sacha's body to care for her in a way that she still had control of when she left.

Dr. Kumar & medical team are the most gracious people who took the most dutiful and compassionate care of her with the most respect.

We are eternally grateful to MFAT-NZ, NZ High Commission, NZDF and India Defense Force, India Foreign Affairs, Indian High Commission Wellington, family friend Michelle Kaufman-Walker, travel broker, and our hosts at the NZ High Commission compound India Michelle and Mark, who have taken us into their home looking after Natasha as their own. 

Sacha is now in the land and hearts of all here in India as one of their own, with Bruce, Natasha, and me having been loved and cared for completely ❤️ as family.

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